N is for No

This would currently be my 2 1/2 year old daughter's favorite word. And if that wasn't enough, my husband, tired of the no, taught her other fabulous ways to say it. Nien, Niecht, nu-uh, no way jose, nope. All Ns.

Now while the little one has this down pat, I seem to have trouble saying it. When someone asks me to do something I immediately say sure. It isn't until I get home and have a panic attack when I input it into my schedule,  that I realize I may be a tish overstretched.

Why is it that sometimes we are incapable of saying no? Is it because we want to help and genuinely feel the desire to serve? Or (at least for me) the more likely culprit of not wanting to disappoint someone.

Oddly enough, when someone else offers to do something for me, I don't hesitate to say no thanks. I suppose I don't want to be someone's burden.

Just rambling out loud on the keyboard.

M is for Mistakes in Motherhood

Not a day goes by without a moment where I think, yup I have scarred my kids for life.

Words sound a whole lot different coming out of my mouth than my five year old's. Sometimes I can't tell how harsh something sounds until it's parroted back at me.

The other night my oldest daughter was playing with her little sister. Apparently a two and half year old does not grasp the finer nuances of whack-a-mole and my preshcooler took issue with that.
 "If you can't play right, you don't get to play," she shouted and threw the game across the room.
I took issue with her behavior. My reply was angry and scolding,  "If you can't play nicely, you won't have any friends and no one will want to play with you." Then, since it was close to bedtime, I sent her off to her room to chill out and go to sleep early.

Alas she did not go quietly in the night. For the next half hour I could hear her screaming from her bed. "I don't want to go to sleep. I hate you. I'm going to go find a new family."  A little while later I heard the phrase that broke my heart. "I don't want to be alone. I need friends."

Somewhere along the line I had screwed up. I had made a colossal mistake in motherhood and made my daughter feel unloved. It had not been my intent to hurt, just a frustrated attempt at correction. So What was I gonna do about it now?

I felt it would be an even worse mistake to let my child go off to sleep thinking that no one loved her. So I sat down with her, gave her loves and took the 2 minutes to explain why her behavior was unacceptable. Basically what I should have done in the first place. Afterwards I got my kiss goodnight and she was out like a light.

Not so much for me. I sobbed to my husband that I was the worst mother in the whole world. That we should start saving now because my kids would end up having huge therapy bills. He reminded me that kids were pretty darn resilient and my daughter would get over it. And the next time I got angry, I should just love 'em to death.

Sure enough, the next day my daughter gave me oodles of love and hugs. Telling me she loved me, that I was the best mommy ever. What I learned was that everybody makes mistakes. In particular, I will continue to make mistakes. It's what we do afterwards that defines us as a parent.

I for one am going to apologize to my mother for the time I packed up my stuffed animals and ran away to my best friends house. I don't remember what she did that made me so angry, but I remember the tears in her eyes when she couldn't find me. Sure when I was discovered I got grounded, but I also got nearly hugged to death.

L is for Lullaby

My favorite part of the day when my girls were little, was bedtime. Not only because the little beasts were going to sleep, but because of our lullaby ritual.

I would swaddle my baby and sit in the rocking chair and sing a song or two until there little eyes were nice and droopy. Sometimes I would sing Twinkle Twinkle, or Rock a Bye Baby. But I had a favorite lullaby for each girl that is a little... different. I figured, hey they don't know what the heck I'm saying. As long as it's low and soothing I could sing the phonebook.

So for my oldest, my favorite tune was Death Cab for Cutie's I''ll follow you into the dark. 


For my little one is was the Smith's Sing me to sleep.

To this day I get misty eyed when I hear those songs on the radio. They remind me of a time that was precious, crazy, and worth every minute.

What did you sing to your little ones?

K is for Kokomo

This was my mother's favorite song when I was a kid. My friends all thought I was a little weird when I picked the Beach boy song to lip sync to in 6th grade instead of U2 or Depeche Mode. Yep, branded a dork for life.

Eventually, my mom homeschooled me for the rest of 6th grade. We watched South Pacific, Carousel, and Camelot. I developed a love for the Beach boys as well as musicals. Though my tweeny counterparts may have disagreed, this made me a well rounded individual.

So thanks mom, for making me a dork. I love you. And I still sing Kokomo in the Shower.

Aruba, Jamaica, oohh I wanna take ya...

J is for Jarom

Jarom is my husband and my favorite person in the world...most of the time. We just celebrated our 12th anniversary.

My book is autobiographical, so my husband is a big part of it. In reading it, he was a little confused of my portrayal of him. He thought I made him out to be Superman. But isn't that what your spouse should do? See the piece of greatness that is hidden from yourself.

So this is my love letter to my husband. He champions my strengths, supports me through my weakness, and is the mirror in which only the best of myself is reflected.

I challenge you to write a love letter to your favorite someone: Mother, husband, father, child

I is for Invent

in·vent

 

[in-vent]

verb (used with object)

1.

to originate or create as a product of one's own ingenuity,experimentation, or contrivance: to invent the telegraph.

2.

to produce or create with the imagination: to invent a story.

3.

to make up or fabricate (something fictitious or false): to invent excuses.

If you are a writer, you should add inventor to your list of titles. Dictionary.com says so. Look at definition number 2. That is also the definition of what an author does. We are inventors of story, of worlds, of characters. 

With the right words we can change the world.

H is for Heffalump

Aside from Eeyore, my favorite cartoon character is Lumpy- the heffalump from Winnie the pooh. The heffalump was originally created by A.A Milne in his classic stories. A.A. Milne was a freaking genius. His stories and characters have so many levels and depth to them. Sometimes I wonder if it was all masterfully intended or if its more like a rorschach painting- everybody sees what they want to see.

What amazed me about the heffalump, was the creation of something new and magical from something ordinary. A big gray old elephant transforms into a checked honey stealing companion to a woozle. The imagination is a wonderful thing. And who has more imagination than a child. That's why it's refreshing to shirk off the chains of adulthood, if only for a while, and indulge in stories from our childhood.

Whose your favorite character from Winnie the Pooh and why