Having fun on the page - Not

When a friend told me I needed a tagline, I came up with "Having fun on the page". Because that's what I like to do. Be playful, light, maybe a little snarky. If I'm having fun writing , hopefully it means that the reader can have fun reading.

Lately, I have not been having fun. And it shows. My writing feels labored and forced. I'm just trying to get my character from point a to point b. Nobody has fun walking in a straight line.

My shoulders and my brain are weighed down, wondering- Is this sentence good enough? I used to able to just crank scenes out. Now I find myself second guessing whether something is worth reading.

Recently I went to LDS Storymakers conference. There were so many of my author idols in one room, it was sweat inducing. I met so many new friends, both published and published. I also went to a lot of great classes and learned things that I wouldn't have thought of before.

But now I find myself thinking too much. I'm having trouble constructing sentences for fear that Darth Editous (yes I'm looking at you Tristi) would make my paper bleed red.

I think one of my biggest problems is that I am trying to edit before I even write it. I am worried that I don't have enough character development, or that the plot is too simple.

Plain and simple, I am squishing my own creativity. I need to find the fun parts of the story again. After its on the page, I can worry about grammar, or whether I say was too often. I need to overcome the fear that it won't be enough. If it's not enough the first time, I will just have to tweak it until it is.

But I guarantee it will never be enough if I can't even get it on the page.

And where's the fun in that?